wrecked for Jesus and the LGBT

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this is written for everyone. including you. its a detailing of what God has been doing recently in my life. though it might unnerve you, let it soak your heart a little bit. i hope that you will feel the love of God reverberating throughout my fingertips as i type out my hearts yearnings.

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my good friend Jesus is helping me to strip off all my unnecessary western cultural christian baggage to follow in his footsteps, and man, it has been wonderful.

After all these years of following Jesus, i've acquired loads of knowledge about God, the bible, etc from sermons, books, and conversations with pastors. however, its a bit ironic that though i've gained a lot of knowledge about God for the sake of being wise, i am more foolish than ever because i have forgotten the God's greatest commandment which is to LOVE Him and to LOVE others. As someone who has chosen Jesus, i've wrongfully placed theology above His greatest commandments, both which are centered on LOVE! though i am grateful for the sweet nuggets of holy knowledge that i've been blessed with thus far, i've been missing out on the real meat of what God is offering: life to its fullest and in abundance by being a reflection of Jesus.

Simply being nice to people isn't enough! offering donuts on sunday just doesnt cut it. we aren't loving until others see Jesus in us! love is no word to throw around; it is powerful and carries so much weight! a lot of times i find myself trying to explain who God is instead of showing who God is. since the bible says "God is love" are we really showing God if we've not loving people? no one will see God unless they see a true sense of love which He embodies. this means dropping our debate-centered intentions and getting out of Christian cliques to deeply involve ourselves in life-breathing ways unto the lives of people who are dearly missed by God. a donut and tract just dont convey His reckless passion for us.

and this is something that i want to ask my fellow Brothers and Sisters in Christ with joy and compassion: why is it that we take greater pride and joy in our good teachings and not in the harvest that love bears? or how about sermons and that make us feel entitled to a sense of prestige because we think of ourselves as enlightened beings while we harbor disdain and contempt for our brothers and sisters in other churches with the same heart that we offer the Lord? And by that same heart, we fail to share the Father's heart for his prodigal children by condemning them as if they were scum and not encouraging them with hope to become rightful heirs to His throne. Though they are good things, Jesus did not die so that we could have bible studies and prayer meetings. He died so that ALL men could be saved. Though we cant express who God is without proclaiming that he is an almighty God who will judge us after we pass away, we've misrepresented him by failing to show that his love and mercy is greater than his judgement. as a result, people tend to think that God is an angry man waiting to punish us in our imperfections. eventually,people gain a distorted view of who God instead of who he truly is: someone loved the world so much that he himself died so we could spend eternity with him. in these ways, we who call ourselves His people, have become more pharasaic than Christ-like. until we decide to swallow that truth, we will continute to be more anemic to the cause of Christ than to the establishment of heaven on earth. COME ON FAMILY! my heart wells with love for you! let's be passionate about one another and our prodigal siblings! the absence of love changes church from a family into a competition! No one should be able to harbor any skepticism or doubt in our love for ALL people.

this wrecked me hardcore and made me recommit my life to simply and radically obeying the Lord out of an overflow of adoration of His passionate love for imperfect people.

I believe that people of LGBT backgrounds have become the modern day leper colony because Christians have treated them that way. God's followers - who are supposed to be lights of love and hope unto others - have shunned the gay community and have failed to treat our gay brothers as though Jesus died for them. instead, we have insulted, humiliated, and treated them as if they were the scum of society. A good friend of mine put it in a powerful and true way:

"if Jesus were here today, he wouldnt have spent most of his time at Church. He would have been at the Gay bars spending time with people forgotten by society."

Lights are meant to go in dark places, and as the parable of the lamp says, anyone who decides to follow Jesus should run to the darkness to be the lamp upon a stand that shines for othersin the darkness to see.

the LGBT center on our campus is filled with so many great and amazing people, which should come to Christians as no surprise. As i've been hanging out there the past few weeks with my good bro Sam, we've made a lot of good friends out of love and not obligation or duty. we're praying and believing for a revival in the LGBT. Please pray that God pierces the hearts of our LGBT brothers and sisters, and that they would realize his authentic love and the original identity that He had created them to embrace.

On one occaision while some friends and i were praying for the campus, we felt led to visit the LGBT center to pray that God would bless it. as we arrived at the steps leading up to the space, i felt a noticable pain in my right ankle as i went up the steps. it intensified as i walked closer to the LGBT center. my initial reaction was to ignore it as some random spasm of pain, but what I've started realized is that God will use even our own bodies to get our attention for the sake demonstrating his Godship to his precious children nearby (in reference to everyone; God views us all as His children). After sharing the pain in my ankle with my friend, he suggested that we walk over to the LGBT (there were people studying inside) to ask if anyone's ankle had been hurt. as we approached the door, a guy in a blue t shirt (wont share his name on this blog yet) opened it to leave. though i'm not particularly bold, i remembered my commitment to the Lord and called out to the dude as he was walking away and asked "hey man, does your ankle hurt?"

he was stunned. absolutely shocked. stuttering, he shared how he had gotten into an accident that left his ankle hurting. with curiousity, he asked "how did you know?"

stupidly, i replied with "REALLY?! THATS AWESOME!" not because his ankle had been hurt, but because God actually had a plan to speak to this dude through my chunky leg! obeying God is totally crazy!

oh yeah. and just to let you know, im not what some people referred to as an extraordinarily prophetic person who has the gift of prophecy/healing or whatever. im just a dude. sometimes, i feel like i dont even have a grid for it. haha i think i may have been more amazed than the other dude, but i guess thats what makes it awesome. it just goes to show that God chooses to move in creatively prophetic ways through imperfect and ordinary people like us. all it takes is a simple heart that desires and is willing to reveal God's divinity and passion for his children.

we took that opportunity to share that God knew more about him than just his ankle and that he desired a relationship with him. He was in a rush, so we quickly prayed with faith (believing that he would be healed) for his ankle and opted to stay in touch. when he walked away, my ankle instantly stopped hurting. I truly believe he was healed and I CANNOT wait to meet up with him! craziness!!

that's the crazy thing about God. because when his children have the faith to step out and put themselves on the line, He shows up and does amazing things that have the power to instantly change lives in ways that our strategies and philosophies cannot. We will never see someone's heart moved to see God through a debate, but hearts are pierced when we create space for God to demonstrate his Godship. When we stop debating about whether or not God heals, and we simply begin to obey the word's commands to pray for the sick and afflicted, we adopt a heart like that of Jesus's: a simple devotion. Instead of obedience, we ask questions. we feel a compulsive need to logically rationalize a command before we do it, which in itself requires very little faith and is, in itself, disobedience. praying for people to be healed should is not about being a radical Christian, a charismatic Christian, a conservative Christian, or identifying oneself with any other culturally-inspired spiritual movement. its about a simple heart that says "Lord, i have read what you desire of me and whether you still heal today or not, i do not care. i simply want to obey them with confidence and faith, believing each time that they will be fulfilled."

2 weeks ago when i went out of town to Irvine to visit some childhood friends i had grown up with in San Jose, an amazing thing happened. we were hanging out at my friend Chris's house and suddenly i felt a random and noticeable pain in my hand/wrist. just a few hours earlier, my friend Brian Orme had encouraged me to start praying with faith that God would actually heal sicknesses through our prayers. after debating whether to speak up or not and sitting on the fence for a good ten minutes, i asked my group of ten or so friends if anyone's hand/wrist had been hurting lately. i was shocked when my friend Julie shared that she had chronic pain in her hands that would bring tears to her eyes and even lead to immobilization and trips to the emergency room. we were filled with boldness, and decided to pray for her with faith that her wrist would be completely healed. after a few minutes, we finished praying to which she didnt feel any noticeable change in her body. she thanked us for the prayer, and we all went our separate ways to get ready for school the following day. after a few days had passed by, i felt the urge to call her and see how show was doing, only to receive this facebook message on my wall while chillin @ the LGBT center:

"hello brian! my joints haven't been hurting at alllllllll since that day!
it usually gets really bad before it rains too but i didn't get any pain at all last night! i'm amazed! :D"

as i did mental backflips of ecstacy for the next couple minutes, i realized that there was no lightning bolt from the sky or fire pillar from heaven when we prayed for her. though it was a subtle holy moment unfelt and unextraordinary to the naked eye, its impact was far-reaching and extremely significant to my friend Julie, whom God cares about deeply.

maybe we dont see healings in America as often as overseas because we dont actually expect someone to be healed after we pray for them. im totally guilty of praying faithless prayers for sick people out of a sense of christian obligation or pity, and i want to encourage you that we dont have to pray like that. Jesus said in the bible that it is by faith we are healed, and that faith can do extraordinary things. therefore, the healing that was poured out was not by some amazing teaching or training that is received or unlocked, but simply a release of something that is already there: the holy spirit responding to a willing and believing heart that wanted to obey God. God totally moves through all of us. even in little, complaining asian boys.

dont get me wrong. im not trying to be a hippie boy into love and healing because it's cool or for the sake of the advancement of my personal beliefs/views on how we should live. these are just the achings of your God's heart which i believe is transplanted in us as we seek to understand his great joy and passion in us. let's be authentic and pure in our love - a pure reflection of Jesus.

i hope this finds you well and fills you with encouragement. please dont ever forget, God sees so much worth and beauty in you even when you do not.

This is crazy

2009

here's to a new year!

a relationship with Jesus is amazing. if you dont have one yet, try something new this year. He is that good.